Thursday, January 27, 2011

Don't Dream, It's definitely over!

This morning, while perusing around my boring facebook page, an ad caught my eye...EXAHOLICS! So I clicked the link and found an actual twelve step program for getting over an ex. Personally, I don't think a twelve step program is what's necessary to get over an ex. If you can't understand why something is over, take a good look at your own behavior in the relationship! I'm never the best person for relationship advice. Obviously, my failed marriage is not entirely someone else's fault. But it is just that...failed and over. I've stood my ground this time and am proud to say even when given guilt trips, called a slut, called a drunk, called a's still over. I don't understand how anyone would think those moments of genius would make someone want you back. It doesn't work that way!

So the bitch in me (not a huge part of me...but it's there) wants to send this link to my ex. I want him to move on for the sake of my boys and myself. No more dragging out the inevitable with promises of changing and "doing better". Since August/September, I have had my mind made up to see this divorce through and never suffer the same heartache that I have for the last...well almost decade. I've had to pay for the divorce in it's entirety, which is no small feat in itself. I should have the last "installment" paid Friday. Hopefully that means everything is over. I just can't wait for this drama to fade and me to move on with my life. Most importantly, I want my boys to be happy and healthy kids. Listening to their father continually go on about why I should take him back and being put in the middle, is far from healthy. I just want to physically hurt him when my babies cry to me because I should "give Daddy another chance".

I think the best idea so far, is I don't give a fuck if he gets over me. I didn't abuse, use, and mistreat everyone around me for my own selfish gain. I've grown indifferent on the feelings of those who do mistreat others. If you deserve it. Learn from your past or you are doomed to repeat it, Right? I know I will never be anyone's doormat again. So if you can't get over your ex, you just don't want to believe it's over, or you can't let go of the past...check out Exaholics. Maybe you can buddy with other sad, depressed individuals who can't deal with the pain.

Me...I'm good and will stay that way! 


1 comment:

Copyboy said...

Good for you!!! You are no one's doormat anymore. You're opening the window to a new day.