Saturday, January 1, 2011

New Year rules to live by

I'm creating a list of things that I must do/not do in the next year. I've been through my share of shit in 2010 and I'm determined to make 2011 a better year for everyone! Who am I kidding? I'm incapable of this feat, but at least writing some of this down may concrete it into my head.

#1 Do not let anyone else determine how you feel about yourself. No more putting feelings into another person's hands. Just asking for disaster. If you need help recognizing that you do here. This article explains what I couldn't seem to convey for a decade.

#2 Do one thing a day that makes you smile. Doesn't matter what it is...just smile more.

#3 Look at the world with childlike amusement more often. As adults we often forget how everything seems from a child's perspective.

#4 Do something daring. Step outside of your comfort zone once in a while...go's ok :D

#5 Learn a new word every week. (use it in a sentence)

#6 Assert yourself!!! This one is huge. If you want something...get it. It's not going to fall into your lap and if it does, it's probably not worth wanting in the first place. Go after the fruit on the highest limb. It's much sweeter!

#7 Become more open to other peoples ideas. Sometimes others will suggest great things, don't shut them off at the starting gate. They may have your best interest at heart and if not what does a little fun hurt?

just drive!
#8 We are not given a specific number of days to live. Enjoy life while we're here. Love, laugh, and drink too's over too soon! Be open to your feelings with others. Don't hide them for any reason!

#9 Take a road trip. Go no where...just go!

and finally #10 Don't dwell in the past. It's over. Learn from the past to realize the future will be better. If all else fails and the future is hard and stormy, remember that it could be worse and make the best of the stormy weather. Get an umbrella! 

Ultimately, this list was compiled with my needs in mind. I know my shortcomings and am fully aware of what I need to do to improve. Having this to refer back to through the year should help cement it in my head. Yes, 2010 was was 2009 and 2008 and 2007, but we are given the chance to make the best of 2011, why don't we? No more negativity and pessimism. I just want to genuinely be happy! I don't think it's impossible, I don't think it's improbable even...just going to take some effort to make it happen. So for those of you who look at the new year with disdain, make it better yourself. Ghandi said "Be the change you want to see in the world", I've always taken this to mean what it says...but look deeper. If you look at life through more positive eyes, wouldn't things be more positive? Just Sayin! This time, instead of complaining about how 2011 will suck, and you don't want to deal with it, make the best of it. There is always a choice in how we react in any situation. Make the positive choice a little more often. I can hear some of you now, "But I don't want to put myself out there and get hurt (again)" or "It's all bullshit anyway". Pain is a part of life and if we run from it forever we are doomed to experience it inevitably. It will catch you in some form or another. Why not say "fuck it" and just do what you want for a change? If we cage ourselves into being unhappy and miserable, how can we expect to ever feel anything but just that!

Friday, December 31, 2010

New Reads

So I almost missed New comic day due to that troublesome job as mentioned in my post yesterday! Wednesday I looked forward to leaving work a bit early and heading down to the comic shop for the new Batman: Detective comic and whatever else I could grab. I know that for some people this is just spending money frivolously on something that I don't need, but I see it as a reward for not smoking in over two weeks. That was a $5 a day habit so if I spend $15 a week on comics or other things I want, I think it's a fair (not to mention smart) trade. Ok, so back to the story...

During a slow work day, I was looking forward to getting off early for the trip across town. To my surprise, the comic I wanted sold out in under two hours. There was no way I was going to get it and I got seriously pissed. I don't want much usually, but I really wanted this! It's bad enough I'm going to lose most of the books I have now, but to not get new ones, especially when they are as highly recommended as #871/#872, UGH!

As usual, I ended up waiting on my Mom to bring the boys. I know where I get my punctuality problems. That woman is perpetually late for everything!!! So not only did I miss out on the issues I wanted, but I don't even get to make it over to the shop to check out anything else. I work almost constantly and the shop doesn't open early enough for me to go in before work. Good news for those of you who feel sorry for me because I don't get the new Batman....the Dark Knight himself came to my rescue yet again and hooked it up! I have to agree with everyone I've talked to about these...the art is flawless, and the writing is amazing! I'm looking forward to continuing this from now on!!! At least this is an addiction that won't kill me in 30 years....for now I'm one happy nerd girl!

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Grow a Pair!

For some reason or another I've heard this alot lately. I need to "grow a pair" and say what I want/need. While the idea is rather easy, the truth is, I don't like asserting myself. I'm just plain old scared of speaking my mind. There are few moments in my life when I have said something that was important to me at the exact moment I wanted to say it. This comes as no shock to any of you who know me on a personal level. It took me years to build up the courage to get a divorce, I guess for me it seems easier to just deal with things being miserable than to speak up and change it myself.

I guess it's easy to understand why I've been constantly walked on all of my life. My mom used me as a maid, my husband-a doormat, my friends-a pin cushion....when's it gonna be my turn? (done in my best Cleveland impression) Ultimately this post is brought on by the bullshit I deal with on a daily basis. Someone in my life....we'll call him Bill (he likes sweaters) Well Bill has very little responsibility for anything and makes a large sum of money. Month after month, There is never a schedule made. I have gone into a work-week as far as Thursday without a proper schedule (starts on Sunday). Not to mention the other lacking areas of responsibility. Being in management is supposed to require more effort and thought. That's why they make the big bucks and I do not! I guess this is weighing heavily on my decision to transfer to a different location. Yes, ultimately I would love to not work the retail side of T-mobile, and do more marketing/projections, but we gotta do what we can to KEEP our foot in the door. It is so out of character for me to sell anyone anything, but I seem to make some where near the goals that have been set before me, but still, I'm trying. So I'm looking to move in the near future. I can't keep dealing with this drive, Alisha is going to be moving in with me (definitely need more space) and over all I want a new start at a new place! There are memories in Roanoke, I don't want to remember them any more. I want to hold something tangible for a moment and realize I've worked for it...I haven't seemed to find the time to do that just yet, but it's coming soon I know!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

The Crow

Welcome to another installment of what I'm sure you sit on the edges of your seats for every week (eye roll) Way Back Wednesday! This week's post is brought to you by work induced boredom which allowed for its creation while I earned my meager wages today. This is a Way Back of monumental proportions, for me at least. I have been debating lately on how "way back" I wanted to take these posts since I already feel old and decrepit, but I decided to go as far as it takes to educate the masses. This one is relatively recent. No matter what, this blog is for me and my own documentation of my all encompassing awesomeness. So for your pleasure or not:

The Crow

I loved the comic, I loved the movies, I loved the series, and I love everything about this character. The Crow invoked thoughts that allowed me to question life in ways I had previously never thought. Being the good little preacher's daughter, I knew that I was supposed to believe certain things...but what if... I have always had a vivid imagination and looking back this was just one more thing to create the imagination I have today. At the core The Crow is a love story. Not one of those that I typically detest for its mushy over the top romance, but for what I view as real, unwavering affection for another being. This movie has everything I would look for in a romantic film: Evil, unstoppable Love, and Death. Just like me, I know! Yes, I still cry when watching the scene where Brandon Lee actually dies. I loved him before he was famous for being "Bruce Lee's son who died in a movie". Remember Rapid Fire? That movie kicks ass!

I miss The Crow and don't know why I don't currently own it; I guess a trip to Hasting's/Amazon/Misc movie outlet is in order now. I need to own this again!

Honestly, The Crow: City of Angels, pales in comparison, in my opinion, but I do still think it's a decent movie. Even more now that I am a parent myself, no spoilers in this blog, so I'll just say I'd be psycho as well, and leave it at that.

Both of these films have amazing soundtracks, but the City of Angels soundtrack has amazing junior high memories for me that are permanently melted into who I have become over the years. It's where I first learned of Deftones, The Toadies, Korn, Iggy Pop, and PJ Harvey. All of which directly contradicted the musical influences that my parents had spent so much time forcing upon me. Not to mention this albums tiptoe into some awesome hip-hop! (mom loved that) I've always had an eclectic taste in music and this album is nothing if not eclectic! It epitomizes the 90s for me in ways nothing else can touch. I've owned it on cassette (you know those things before cds) then a few years later bought it on cd, and after losing or abusing both of these, I just downloaded it in MP3 form. Yay for the new millennium!! Hopefully this will stand the test of time and I wont have to purchase (laugh) this music again. So I'm posting a couple of my favorite songs for your listening pleasure. If you know it great, and if this is your first time hearing's been my pleasure to share this with you!

Deftones- "Teething"

Above The Law (feat. Frost) - "City of Angels"

Hopefully this WBW installment has left you remembering what it was like watching/hearing this for the first time. If you haven't seen/heard this I strongly urge you to check out both movies and soundtracks. I know there are many more "crow" things that have been released and while I like pretty much anything created about this story, these are unbeatable!

Again, if you have any suggestions for future posts, complaints about past ones, or anything to say about it below. Until next time....

Tuesday, December 28, 2010


So I've not gotten to the point that I wanted by Tuesday; however, it is my favorite blog post day. So I'm going to make the most of it.

I am pretty sure many of you have seen this if you are over the age of 25! It's not necessarily the greatest movie, Edward Furlong isn't the greatest actor...but it's good. It makes you second guess that pointless kill in your average video game, or not, if you're anything like me...I'm still going for head shots.

I promise next week's post will be spot on. I'm just not in my head at the moment. Maybe I will be again soon. Hate to just post a video and call it a day, but I do have to go to work now. So look up Brainscan and tell me what you think!

Sunday, December 26, 2010

to be continued.

I was going to post today about my holiday experience, but have decided it best to wait until my mood improves. I don't know why I'm so blah, but I definitely don't want it here. So until I feel better, my apologies for everything. Though I'm sure it's not a big deal anyway