Tuesday, March 2, 2010

I'm not special?

I recently stumbled across a blog that really hit home...Her name is Jen Kim and her blog is on Psychology Today. This blog was enlightening to me! I look at other people my age and see a pattern. Our parents, the media and educators all made us feel special...or one of a kind. In truth we are so spoiled to believe that when we get into the workforce, our potential employer can't live without us...this is not true. There are millions of twenty-somethings just like me who want to do just want I want, and I'm made to believe that I'll win out amongst all of them. It's great to teach your children that they have skills that are special, but that they still must work hard. Where is the work ethic of the generations before us? We weren't made to work as hard. We have been given everything without the struggle our parents and our parent's parents endured. Jen touches on the technological advances in today's society and how it has made us more self-centered. We, as a group, depend on instant gratification. Try living without social networking for a week...I can't. Does this mean we are bad? I believe it doesn't, but that we must be capable of remaining grounded to the "IRL" part of life. Having many online friends and spending the majority of my free time, either blogging or working on homework (all online) I find that it's much easier to communicate this way. But like many of my peers, I'm finding a pattern in my life that negates anything outside of my office. I guess my goal with this post is mostly introspective (like most other posts I've made). I need to take some time to re-evaluate my goals and find out what is important, but not to forget that the hard work is a necessary evil to accomplish these goals.

I hope that you all read Jen's blog, and in doing so, it opens your eyes as it did mine. But let's not take all the blame...blame Sesame Street, they caused my self-righteous complex!

Monday, March 1, 2010

Working hard to be good

It can be said that I've not been the most supportive, positive and enthusiastic person I could have been. It could be said I'm ruthless, hurtful, and cold...I believe I was never those things before, and have become hardened by years of being used like a worthless plaything. What makes someone's personality take such a drastic nosedive into blahdom? Useless taunts and empty promises are never enough to push someone over the edge...what does? I've tried to keep an open mind and see past all of these walls and lies from everyone around me, but all I find is more lies. I've never been one to try to hurt someone for my own personal gain and still don't...but I will say, if you cut, I cut deeper, if you hit, I hit harder...keep it in mind before you start anything with me. I've waited a lifetime being subservient to those who don't deserve servitude, and now I'm pissed! Maybe I'm mad at myself...maybe at all of the times I've been walked on. I'm betting on both...but trust me that I won't be anyone's doormat anymore and I've bitten my tongue for the last time!

On a positive note (see I am trying!!) My school papers are finally finished...I found someone today who knew what they were actually talking about and took care of everything! No more waiting on paperwork to be approved, I'm good to go! I've worked on catching up homework and found that I enjoyed it. Two weeks away and it was like coming home to an old friend. I hope things stay this way...